by Rugayah Kassim
I am very grateful to Barney and Mind Transformations for imparting NLP to me. It was a great investment of my time, effort and money attending the NLP Practitioner course. Without this knowledge, I would be lost. My future will be full of overwhelming challenges. Having learnt NLP has changed me a lot, helping me channel my anger into productive actions, being more resourceful, confident, effective and successful in my life.
I am now interacting and communicating more effectively with friends and pupils, feeling more focused, mellowed and more understanding than before I knew NLP. I’ve found that the NLP Presuppositions are so profound and accurate, and have changed my mindset considerably.
NLP presuppositions are beliefs that support a person to be successful. I use the presuppositions appropriately in my interactions with colleagues and they (presuppositions) have helped them to a large extent too. A colleague of mine once expressed frustration over students who fell short of expectations. I mentioned, “There is no failure; only feedback. If you try doing the same things and keep getting the same results, it shows that you should change the way you go about getting it.” I also said, “The person with the most flexibility of thought and behaviour will have a greater chance of success.” She sounded very grateful and thanked me for my comments and advice.
Perceiving from Other Points of View
Another colleague became utterly agitated upon hearing that she had to provide temporary shelter to someone she didn’t like. But when I spoke about Perceptual Positions, she was calmed. Perceptual Positions is a technique that allows a person to view a situation from three different points of view for greater empathy and objectivity. I also mentioned that there is a positive intention behind every behaviour. I managed to get her to respect other people’s model of the world. I then realised that I cannot not influence others when I am communicating with them.’
My knowledge of Touch for Health, Elements of Colour and Brain Gym, complementary health and learning techniques, have contributed a lot to my success at work. As a teacher-counsellor cum teacher-in-charge of discipline and pupil welfare, I handle teething disciplinary problems among pupils. At times I see myself as a psychologist as well as a first-aider. I am like a psychologist because I am able to help pupils with learning, behavioural and emotional problems, and I am like a first-aider because I am able to treat pupils with minor physical injuries using my pain relief techniques learnt some time back. However, I was truly not confident and effective enough to help them. After attending NLP, I discovered a lot more useful and powerful helping techniques. I am particularly surprised to learn that all change, learning and behaviour is unconscious.
Speaking in Metaphors, Speaking to the Unconscious
Taking the leap of faith, this seed hung on to the wind and off it went. Like a bird that soared the sky, it felt great to be able to see what the world had in store for it.
Recently, I used Metaphors to get messages across to pupils more effectively. I am able to get their attention by telling them stories. Recently, a few tutors in the Buddy Reading Programme in my school gave up teaching the younger children how to read. However, all except one changed their minds about quitting after I told them a story of how a helpless child was drowning in the deep sea and how that child was not getting any help because no one wanted to help him even though they could help. I asked the tutors whether they would like to see their tutees ‘drown’. The tutors became apologetic and finally told me they wanted to continue teaching the younger children. How overjoyed I was to realise my more flexible and effective communication skills.
In another instance, I told a pupil a story about my canoeing expedition long ago.
How I was able to reach my destination safely because I was focused on my outcome. It connected to her in a way. I used the ‘Swish’ Pattern to help her get rid of her bad temper and to replace it with good and controlled temperament. With another pupil, I used the Collapse Anchor technique to arouse a ‘brave’ state after collapsing a ‘fearful’ state. The pupils were put into their desired states in the shortest possible time and were happy when they left.
I discovered that my conflict management skills have improved with NLP.
I am now able and confident enough to tackle acute disciplinary problems by using the Meta and Milton Models. Once I witnessed a boy punching another boy while I was in the school hall. The few quick punches from one boy resulted in the other one’s lower lip getting slightly cut and swollen and his abdomen bruised. I managed to stop the fight with the help of other boys. I used Meta Model questioning techniques to arrest any distortions, deletions and generalizations. Distortions, deletions and generalisations are shortcuts to thinking that are generally useful but can also result in misunderstandings between people.
It took me quite some time to resolve the issue at hand, but I managed to get the pupils to settle their problems amicably among themselves. I was also able to resolve pressing discipline problems promptly with the renewed confidence I had after learning NLP. The boys would probably have been severely punished by the Operations Manager otherwise.
The Power of Suggestion
I particularly like the Milton Model of Suggestions, a technique of speaking in suggestions to the subconscious, because it can be useful in handling noisy classes too. One day, I paused my lesson because the class next door was very noisy. The teacher could not keep the pupils quiet, so to help her out, I went in and said, “Children, I cannot teach next door because you are disturbing me and making a lot of noise. I know that all of you are very good pupils. I want you to put your hands up in the air and listen to me and follow whatever I say because good children listen to their teachers and good children want to become clever, and clever children know how to keep quiet when the teacher is talking … etc.” The children really went into a trance without even closing their eyes and they were quiet! That was to me a wonderful achievement.
During the school’s Physical Fitness test held at a stadium recently, a number of children felt giddy and were feeling nauseous, while some were out of breath and even collapsed at the end of the 1.6 km run. A particular asthmatic girl cried hysterically as she developed difficulty breathing after completing the run. I went to the girl’s aid and unconsciously applied some neuro-vascular touches which I learned a couple of years back which could enhance her lungs, her heart and other organs’ functions. I also unconsciously applied the Milton Power of Suggestion to suggest to her that she was in charge of her mind and her body. I told her to imagine herself in a happy, relaxed and healthy state, and I told her that she would be breathing better and better and would feel lighter and lighter by the minute. I told her that things were only going to get better and better with every breath that she took. I repeated those suggestions a couple of times and encouraged her to relax. She stopped crying and felt much better after that. I was shocked to discover later that the girl was actually on an asthma inhaler. However, I was happy because I was able to alleviate her problems, calm her down and somehow able to bring her to the desired state in such a short but panicky period.
Another runner who suffered from exhaustion and collapsed after the run was also helped by the power of suggestions. God bless those who passed down this powerful knowledge for mankind. The Head of Department who was in-charge on that day praised me when he made this comment, “She is very good in everything and it is good to have this type of people around.” Well, was I very happy that day! I discovered that the things I learned from NLP were really helpful and powerful.
My self-esteem soared even higher when I managed to help an emotionally distressed pupil out of her plight using suggestions.
This particular girl was asked by her form teacher to sit with someone whom she could get help to improve her English. She obviously didn’t like that idea. She became very upset and suddenly turned drowsy and uneasy. As her teacher did not know what to do with her, she panicked and sent her to the sick bay to seek some help. As my normal practice, I asked the girl whether she felt any pain in her body. She denied feeling any pain but admitted feeling a little drowsy. I tried touching her balance buttons whichI learned in Brain Gym to balance her body as well as putting her in the cook’s position and positive points to make her positive and relaxed but to no avail. I discovered later that her fingers were stiff as though she was in great fear and distress. She looked rather uncomfortable and uneasy. So I started to use whatever suggestions I knew to help her. And “Hey presto!” I became a Hypnotherapist! It was a wonderful experience for me as I saw her fingers slowly but surely becoming and feeling more supple and relaxed. I repeatedly told her that she was responsible for her results and that she was in charge of her mind and body. I repeatedly told her to relax every muscle in her body starting from her head all the way down to her toes. She began to fall asleep, but the truth is she was actually in a deep trance! Upon waking up, the girl said that she was okay and went to the canteen to eat.
I have become a walking free hypnotherapist. With my knowledge of NLP, Hypnotherapy and Time Line Therapy, I feel like a new person. I am happier and more stable now. Well done Barney and Mind Transformations! I hope that each step you take will bring you closer to the goal that you seek to achieve! Keep spreading your wings, fly high up in the sky!
The techniques described in this article are covered in the NLP Practitioner Certification Course & NLP Master Practitioner Certification Course.